Antislipslideiditis ... Solved!

antislipslideiditis ( -n .... the inability to slip or slide without massive surges of adrenaline and ensuing tenderness of the posterior)

Growing up, I always had my daddy's hand to hold when life got slick. Therefore, I wasn't aware that I had antislipslideiditis until one fateful day in the first grade when I found myself quite unexpectedly sprawled on an icy sidewalk looking up into the face of the boy who had been walking behind me.

He gallantly assisted me to my feet and we continued along the sidewalk with our classmates. Swoooooop ... BANG! There he was again ... bending over me with a most puzzled look in his eye.

Swoooooop ... BANG!

I couldn't take more that two steps without wiping out again! In exasperation, he finally clamped his mittened hands firmly under my arms as my feet skittled over the ground. Together we arrived safely at our destination.

Tim Troyer ... if you are out there anywhere and happen to read this, THANK YOU!! I'm pretty sure that I owe your my first grade life!

Over the years, I watched enviously as my classmates ran and INTENTIONALLY slid across frozen surfaces. They thought it was FUN! I sighed wistfully as I watched figure skaters glide and twirl. I trailed behind every group, painstakingly inching from point A to point B like a wobby granny!

It was so not cool!

It didn't get better as I grew older. In college, one of my first encounters with Wayne involved him rescuing me from the center of a frozen parking lot. Since no respectable girl wants to go through life hanging on her daddy's arm, I needed to marry a man who could walk on ice!

Fast forward to 2008 ... and I am living here in Keene Valley where the ground is snow-covered almost six months a year! What was I thinking?!?!?!

Take for example the path to our barn.

It looks harmless enough ... but when you have a lively dog on the other end of the leash, it becomes a treacherous slope!!

This is a Yak (-n ... a large, stocky, shaggy-haired wild ox, of the Tibetan highlands, sure-footed on icy terrain) Photo courtesy of http://www.simonatkins.com/ See all that snow and ice? That yak can trot right over it!

Unfortunately, we don't have any yak (yaks? yaki?) here in the Adirondack mountains ... but their influence has saved my life and restored my coolness!

I'm talking about ... YakTrax - "Confidence on Packed Snow and Ice!"

No - it's not a dog muzzle. Although that wouldn't be a bad idea sometimes either! (just kidding!)

You pull this little rubber/wire gizmo onto the bottom of your very ordinary shoe or boot.

Suddenly ... you can go anywhere! It's a wonderful feeling!


I now sport the same "ice cleats" worn by the International Bobsledding Team - a fact which makes me feel cool and athletic as I stride confidently across the Keene Valley terrain!

Seriously ... if you are dealing with a case of antislipslideiditis (or know someone who is ... think grandma), check out YakTrax. We ice-challenged folk have to stick together!